We are living in an extraordinary time.
Flossie and I are enjoying our daily exercise where social distancing has become the norm. Walkers give others a wide berth while nodding a good morning or passing comment on the weather.
One attempt to alter our route was not too successful.
As Flossie and I traversed a familiar field I spotted a man and a labrador heading our way.
I decided it would be pertinent to take a shortcut to avoid crossing paths. This involved hopping over some barbed wire so we could step into the adjacent field.
This was not wise.
The hop was more of an ungainly clamber. There were two rows of barbed wire at thigh height, no doubt to stop people like me from trying to scale it.
Somehow, as I lifted one leg up, my undercarriage became attached to the wire.
This was an awkward situation, not least because I was in full view of the man and the labrador. My idea of agilely popping into the next field had gone badly wrong.
I wrestled with the barbed wire while Flossie stood on the other side of it wagging her tail and looking puzzled. I was well and truly hooked on.
In an attempt to deflect attention, I paused and looked around as if taking in the beautiful view while straddling a fence was my intention.
I stifled a laugh at how ridiculous I must look but I was also feeling a little panicked. What if I couldn’t extricate myself? Would I need to ask the man for assistance?
After much jostling and muttering, eventually I managed to lift myself up from the fence and unhook the wire which left a small puncture in my jeans. Crisis averted.
We went on our way. I raised a hand to the man in a friendly wave, hoping he hadn’t realised the predicament I had been in. He looked perplexed.
Social distancing rules or not, I won’t be doing that again.
As published in the Bath Chronicle, 23 April 2020
Suzy Pope is a certified copywriter and newspaper columnist specialising in pets, business and lifestyle. If you would like help with a writing project, please get in touch.
